I need to follow up on my previous entry about my chronic neck pain.  I went to the Dr. today to discuss the results of the resent tests they performed.   He said that all the tests came back negative except for a few minor things but nothing to be alarmed about.  He said that the truth was he didn't have an answer for why my neck hurt but that it could be one of three things: postherpetic neuralgia (pain as a result of the shingles I had in 1999), arthritis, or cervical radiculopathy (unknown neck pain).  I'm a little frustrated to say the least.  My PCP told me about 3 years ago that I had arthritis in my neck so basically I just spent a lot of time and money to learn something I already knew.  He decided to start me on some muscle relaxers and a lidoderm patch.  There are of course more agressive treatment options but to be honest the possible long-term effects out weigh the chance for benefit... especially since I am so "young".  So I am going to treat this like it's arthritis (an odd thing for a young person to have).  I do notice that if I stay active I seem to have fewer flare-ups where the pain interferes with my work so I will try to stay limber.  I'll try his medicines but to be honest I just don't have much faith that they will offer any relief.  So... plan for the future... yoga, massage therapy, ibuprophen.  Oh, and I'm supposed to follow-up with him in 3 weeks... we'll see. 

I feel like I should write something today... even if all I can say is, humbly, that I remember. 

 

The loss that my family has endured in the last two years has in many ways sharpened my awareness of just how horrible the events of 9/11 were in 2001.  How deeply did those families hurt to have a loved one so suddenly taken and without cause.  I have cried today... not as a result of emotional pulls from the media or of my own sorrow at losing my sweet sister and father.  I have cried because I know the hurt and I wish there were a way to undo the pain.  Any firefighter will explain, the bond of the "brotherhood" is strong and there is a real fear everyday for their families as they wait to serve.  I cannot imagine the bravery it took to run in when others were running out.  We speak of willingness and servitude to our country but how many of us would really be able to do what those men and women did?  I am humbled. 

 

There are many in generations past who can recall just where they were when JFK was shot or when Pearl Harbor was struck.  Similarly I can recall in detail sitting with my newborn son on the couch folding some laundry and staring unbelieving as the news interrupted the Regis and Kelly show to track the events.  Perhaps it was the realization that life is not gauranteed or maybe the fear that America was no longer safe; my life changed that day just as so many others have.  I hope that in remembering we will make an effort to embrace each other a little closer and value the moments we have with each other more. 

 

I remember 9/11... how could I ever forget. 

Recently I have begun a serious search (for lack of a better word) for the cause of the chronic pain I have had in my left neck and shoulder the last 7 years.  So far my doctors have downplayed the whole thing and simply prescribed anti-inflammatories and muscle relaxers which to their credit are great at knocking me out at night but have not given me any real relief.  So after several visits to my PCP during which I "reminded" her that the pain is still there I was referred to the Spine/Pain clinic at St. John's Hospital for evaluation.  So the nurse has become the patient and I have to say it's not really pleasant!  The specialist decided that I was not suffering from neuralgia related to my bout of shingles in 1999 because I did not present with the hallmark sign; I had not lost my sense of cold to the affected nerve path.  After an MRI that revealed very little the specialist sent me to have a whole body bone scan done to rule out bone disease of any kind... that was performed today.  I was not aware that I would have to be injected with radioactive contrast or that it would take 2 hours to be "taken up" into my bones... to be honest the whole thing really was less than pleasant but at least while I waited to be "lit up" I was able to leave the hospital and go get my hair cut and colored.  So the results should be in to my doctor tomorrow but we will not know until next week because he wants me to also have an electromyogram (EMG) done to rule out problems with the muscles and nerves.  After that test I will meet with the physician again to hear his diagnosis.  In the meantime I am just taking Ibuprophen around the clock and trying not to spend too much time doing activities that increase my pain (like typing at the computer).  So for now that is the sum up of my medical saga.  I'll keep everyone informed of course!

We have had a very eventful month! 

 

Chris was offered a promotion at Battlefield Fire Protection District and he started 4 days ago as Battalion Chief.  I can't even tell you how thrilled we are.  Not only does the promotion come with a decent raise but the district is paying for him to get more training (Officer and Instructor classes)  He is now responsible for operations at two fire houses and will be running twice as many calls along with training for the firefighters on his shift.  It is a wonderful feeling to know that the district thinks so highly of Chris and has placed such confidence in his success!  Keep him in your prayers as he adjusts to his new responsibilities. Of course the kids are thrilled with his new gold badge! 

 

We have continued to unpack boxes (more slowly now) and the house is starting to feel like home.  We were able to buy a new couch for the basement living area so that space is now much cozier!  I'm actually looking forward to fall and winter when we will be able to use our fireplace!  The kids started back to school and have already made many new friends and are loving their teachers!  We are so blessed that the transition to Wilder has been smooth and the kids have been happy with the move.